The thing about music and art for me that has always been a challenge is it’s dual nature of being so personal yet so social in a non linear way. In both states it’s always been a way for me to exercise vulnerability – partly in my capacity or abilities to create art and also about why and how I wanted to share the creations.
The last few years as an artist were, quite honestly, rather juvenile. Music was made, released, written about, art was created, critiqued, ignored, collaborations were had, some that have grown stale, others that disappeared but seem to have found their way back, performances happened with good sound-checks and disorienting sets, lots of fun, too much smoke, music videos, photos, heck even some merchandise, but it was really all-over-the-place. Not very sustainable me thinks….
The truth is, as an artist and I suppose even as a person, I’ve consistently found my degree of connection either with myself or with others (collaborators and audience) often a little imbalanced or misplaced. I attribute this to chance, really, neither positive nor negative, but surely I believe it’s a blessing to be aware of this and even more so that I feel naturally compelled to improve this. I’ve had my moments of weakness and frustrations but really at the end of the day, I do look at my past as lessons to reflect on. Things have gotten better but certain patterns are yet to be broken.